Potty Page

October 24, 2006

What an damned awful journey!

Over the weekend I went to Leicester to help Joe increase the size of a server rack for one of his clients. This went more smoothly that it should have done - especially considering how I thought when I saw the new rack - in it's flat-pack no instuctions glory. There must have been over 100 bolts, nuts and washers and no indication of where to put them!

After much head scratching building and then noticing things "Ooooh, wait that will fit there, not there, arse!" we managed to get it built! As an example on the first picture the horizontal bars are not in the correct place... as we found out when we put the size frames on and went "Oh, look, there's some bolts just the right distance to attatch the horizontal bits to"

the beginning

This is the rack in an almost completed state - without any of the doors on!

nearly the end

We planned on going for lunch at the Burger King we despise. Yeah, I know, silly to go somewhere for food purely because it's shit. Ah well. We couldn't, because it shut down! All the windows whitewashed and the drive through signs all taken down! So we settled for getting lost in Leicester on a mission to find a McD's!

In the evening I went down to Joe's in Warkwickshire for beers. We went to his local, what was definatly a local - not a local in the Nottingham sense of if you're not local you'll get kneecapped, more in a "You're not from around these parts, I'm going to watch you very very carefully."

We got a tad miffed at the end of the night when the landlord asked us if we wanted to buy another drink, which we did, then all the locals left and he wanted us to finish our pints almost as soon as he had pulled them! And it's not even if he asked in a nice way! He stood next to us and said "Would you finish your drinks now please!"... this is a quaint little put in a Warwickshire village not a damned Wetherspoons! Ah well.

Then came the joy of working out how the hell to get back home.

The plan had been to work in Leicester on the Sunday too and I'd get the train home from there... but alas, we're too efficent and did the job on Saturday. Getting to train from down there to up here is a pile of toss, whichever station you look at!

I found that the quickest route (bearing in mind I had to start work at 7pm) was to go from Leamington Spa to Derby (direct train... woo...) and then bus it using a Rainbow 5 to the end of my road in Nottingham. Not getting the train from Derby to Nottingham was happening because it's a bloody Sunday and the railways are fucked on Sundays with rails being replaced left right and centre with buses. Bastards.

Anyways, I missed the bloody direct train due to the Fast Ticket machine being anything than fast. Tits. Not to worry... there was another train to Derby via Brummyland, in an hour's time.

I called Joe and he picked me up again and we went to his Leamington residence for coffee.

So... now I arrive at the station in good time and get on the train. It's waaaaay full. I'm stood unable to move stuck in the vestibule by the toilets. The train pulls of of the station, and stops.

We wait.

The train starts to move slowly again...

And stops.

We wait.

And we wait.

"Due to a signal fault we're going nowhere"

Someone comes along to use the toilet causing all kinds of havoc (this is repeated several times)

Eventually we arrive in Coventry... it's only taken 35 minutes to travel about 10 miles.

Hardly anyone leaves the train. Loads get on. Tits.

Now it's getting a little daft.

Anyways, we arrive at Birmingham International and a girl's not realised that there's two stations with "Birmingham" in them on the journey, she's moved from her reserved seat in order to get off and has the cunning idea of waiting in the toilet whilst people move around the train and she'll get off later. Then she realises that it's not the right station... I and another lad have been pushed in to the doorway and are now also stuck in the toilet with her. Grrr. Not that it really mattered I guess - it was just a little annoying with the door automatically closing all the time.

When we finially arrived at Birmingham, god knows how late, she had clearly missed her connection to Sheffield (and missed her onward connection to Hull). Being the good guy I am I looked up how she should now get their on my mobile phone. Oh dear... she was meant to arrive in Hull at about 19.30... now it looks like due to the connections she'd be there at 10pm! We then decided to look for the stages of the journey in order that if the time allowed for platform changes at the station (or a delayed ongoing train) could get her their any earlier.

We worked out that with any luck she could get the same train as I had to get and get off at Sheffield instead of Derby.


She bought me a Coke for my invaluble help and I went for a piss.

20p for a piss!?

Anyways, I met up with the girl and we got on the train heading to Edinburgh. And I thought the last train was full! Bejeezus! I couldn't move at all.

So then, Derby. Yeah. I could have bought another train ticket to get to Nottingham, which would have involved not actually using a train but a rail replacement bus... or I could have walked and carried out Plan A (normal bus). I decided that I'd try Plan A and walk back to the station if the bus was going to be after the rail replacement...

This involved navigating Derby - which in heignsight wasn't that difficult, but the direction map I'd printed out would have prolly being better just being a street map 'cause I couldn't see any of the roadnames that I was coming across - that god for laser printers, if it was an inkjet I'd have been screwed!

I noticed a girl was following me (well walking behind me) so I asked for some help and she said it was over where she was going somewhereish.

I saw the purple bus drive off. Arse. But at least I was in the right sort of idea I decided.

After looking at many bus stops I decided it'd be a good idea to text Joe and see if he could find the stop number I needed to be at, so I could use a bus stop map to find it. I noticed a Red Arrow bus and decided that I must be in about the right place and in fact although the Red Arrow was direct it was leaving about 40 mins before the Rainbow 5.

Bah, I took it and checked that it was indeed direct... apparantly so. Tits. That meant it would drive within a few yards of my house for me to end up in town to get a bus back...

Well it stopped outside the QMC and let of nurse. Whether this is a real stop or not I don't know (kind of goes against it being a direct bus!) but I leapt off.

Arrived back at home at 6.45pm to find a glowing yuletide inflatable sheep on my bed.


Did my shift at work and went to bed (without the sheep). Wooo!

I'd like to do some thankyous - some of which will never be read by their intended receiver - unless they magically stumbled across this!

Thank you to Joe for the job, a place to sleep, taking me to the station, picking me up again and the coffee! Thanks to Shelly (who's 21st it was on Sunday, what a day to spend on train!) who was the girl going to Hull for the Coke (you really didn't have to) and for keeping me company until Derby and meaning I had someone to talk to whilst cramped on the train instead of doing the standing not talking to anyone else! Thank you to the girl at Birmingham New Street who offered to and converted my 1x10p 1x5p 2x2p 1x1p into a 20p so I could p, because the girl at pastie shop needed me to buy something so she could open the till. Thanks to the girl who helped me find the bus stop in Derby, your blood's worth bottling (link because people look at me strangly when ever I used the term in converstaion before!)! Thanks to the Red Arrow for stopping at the QMC, planned or not. Thanks for reading this if you've got this far. No thanks to Branson, use bigger trains on Sunday. I can't believe you plan to send people to space?

Posted by Ed at October 24, 2006 12:01 AM | Ramble |